As a 5-year-old boy who had no clue what sex was and hadn’t even been taught the proper terminology for my genitals, I went along as a “willing” participant as we tried out various things. So, Bill decided that he would use me to try out the things he had seen. Their minds are unable to properly process what they are seeing and so will look for avenues to try to express their overwhelming emotions and thoughts. As most anyone knows, allowing a child to view sexually explicit material can be both confusing and damaging to the child’s development. What no one knew was that Bill’s parents liked to watch porn and apparently had no problem with allowing Bill to watch as well. Bill and I played together as children do playing pretend and just being boys. I don’t remember if he was exactly the same age as me but I know we were close in age. I would come to learn fairly quickly though that danger can come in lots of different forms.Īt the age of 5, there was a boy in our neighborhood that I was friends with. Simple one story houses with chain link fences.
We lived in a stereotypical 80’s southern neighborhood. As a result, we ended up in the first of many military towns we would live in. My dad joined the Air Force shortly after I was born. This is the story of how God brought me out of a lifestyle that would have likely resulted in my eventual death and redeemed it and brought something good out of it. But, my parents dysfunctional marriage would end up being just one element that would contribute to years of isolation, confusion, anger, addiction, and destructive tendencies. Not exactly the kind of environment where kids tend to thrive. My dad was verbally abusive to my mother, my mother was selfish and lazy. Needless to say, my childhood was less than ideal. Unfortunately, it would take them 8 years and 3 more children to figure that out.
I was the first child of 2 people who should never have gotten married. If these are topics you struggle with, please read with caution. Warning: This testimony involves stories of childhood abuse, marital infidelity and frank descriptions of sexual acts.